I don’t know if this is the matter with me or with everyone else. I usually feel useless. I feel that I have just wasted my whole life and I am going to do the same in my future. I feel hopeless and incompetent. I want to do something new but I see so many unsaid challenges in front me.

Why can’t one go for what HE desires? Why we have to look for the society no matter how much we avoid? Why can’t we choose the right path knowing that we are wrong? Why it hurt us? Why our ego come between us?ย 

I don’t understand what am I doing with my life or what I am going to do or what I have done. I feel standing like a blank idiot. Everyone has an ULTIMATE purpose of life for which they plan their life accordingly and act accordingly. What is the purpose of what I am doing? Okay, If i say I know my purpose. So now what is the plan? How should I plan. What should I do. Who will let me do?ย 

I know it is pure ala kisam ki baqwasiat. You won’t understand. Thank you.


7 thoughts on “Useless

  1. Dear Wafa, I feel exactly the same. Felt, actually. I think I’ve sorted out these thoughts now-at least to some extent. The feeling of such hopelessness that takes you deeper into more hopelessness, and then you think, “What in the world am I even doing here?!”… “Why was I born? What meaning does existence have? What difference am I making in this world?… Does anything I do make a wave?..”
    And of course, the questions that you’ve stated above…
    I made a plan. After working out my purpose, I wrote it down and thought about what I need to do to get there, every little thing. And then I worked that into monthly plans. Made a plan of monthly focus areas. And now after two months, I feel as if I’m getting somewhere.
    Keep in touch and feel free to talk to me if you ever feel the need:)


  2. At least your blogs are not useless ๐Ÿ™‚
    The fact that a random visitor finds it interesting…and comments on it…for instance, shows theres some value to your thoughts.
    And yes 99.9% do not have a definite purpose in life. Thats what keeps them working throughout.


    Deer Wafa. At first, I’ve to appreciate your courage to exxpress whatever you have in your mind and heart at that time.. you must be some rebellious piece of art. :). We all go through these moments from time to time, and literally i was never able to find a solution, i thought of myself as the most confused S*** minded person alive. But the best thing at that time was the people around me.. who unknowingly appreciates your strengths and you get motivation from whatever bakwas too, and minus(-) those bakwas which our so called society thinks and understand as per their perspective which in my opinion ” A JAR full of crap”. which they can not even understand sometimes.

    I think i can write alot of BAKWAAS too. #AWESOME
    please share some tips on how to start an anonymous blog ๐Ÿ™‚


  4. You say you wasted your life to date, yet I find this blog interesting. To be more productive, try to focus on and give more time to high priority tasks. If you chalk out a strategy to do so, it would be great and fruitful.

    P.S.: I don’t see any “bakwas” here. -_- Stop disrespecting your own words, lest others should not read them too!


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